twenties

i am...
in my twenties.
what i am not is stuck, even though i think i am.
my twenties has allowed me to carve out the life ive wanted to live.
it was daunting at first when i took that first step at age 18.
it was scary & liberating & rewarding all at the same time.
its still scary but freeing.
i am my own boss.

i remember...
the nights where i crawled up into a ball in bed crying from my first real heart break.
ramen days in exchange for shopping trips.
clubbing nights with girls, car barring, pre-drinking, & getting home at 5(am) only to be awake 3 hours later for work.
the nursing pre-requisite classes & the horrid commutes.
the nursing program & the sleepless nights & the horrid commutes.
more drinking, partying, quality time with loved ones.
release.

sowing real connections & letting go of what wasnt detrimental to my growth.
constantly learning how to deal with situations & people outside of my comfort zone.
what im not willing to tolerate & what deserves my patience.
what makes me feel good.
what hurts me.
it all equals to the constant addition of wisdom acquired through life lessons.

even though at times i want to be somewhere other than my twenties, i know one day i will miss all of this. ill be nostalgic for the days where sometimes none of it made sense. ill think back on those car drives & late sleepless nights wondering, worrying, & feeling the thrills of being in my twenties all at once.